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Sunday, February 27, 2022

Poem- Videogame Review, Cruis’n Blast for the Nintendo Switch

Videogame Review, Cruis’n Blast for the Nintendo Switch


You do not need to cheat for this game.  In fact, this game is cheating.  My small little motorcycle can really beat up police cars by vehicle collision and the computer opponents are on a strict schedule of either cookie difficulty or impossible difficulty.  I choose “cookie” difficulty.  But, wow!  My motorcycle can just beat up those big, giant cars!  There’s no reason for this situation to happen.  The computer opponents are very automatic.  I was playing for 3 tours and more with the same outcome- that is, I don’t get ahead of the race until the very end.  And that’s not the only problem.  You will find racing mechanics; however, the racing mechanics give false information for what the cars really do.  So maybe I will choose a car that is faster.  And, even when I’m told the car is faster, I can’t make the car go faster.  There’s only guarantee of speed if you choose the 2 fastest vehicles.  For the other vehicles, it’s a mystery as to why racing seems ineffective.  Cruis’n Blast for the Nintendo Switch can make the Nintendo Switch look and play worse than the Sega Saturn gaming console.  Cruis’n Blast is a game about the impossible; however, it’s not a game that does the impossible.  The computer opponents are strict with their movements and there’s little to nothing I can do about it.  For one thing, the racing courses are very short and there’s almost no room for deep drifting exercise with your vehicle.  It’s obvious the programmers were having budget problems; and, when you consider the outcome, the game’s earthquakes do not transfer points of contrast for any vague goal.  It’s too specific for a difference to be made at great length.  Cruis’n Blast is full of “happy” accidents.  In fact, Cruis’n Blast is a “happy” accident.  (It’s a nice mistake.  But, it’s still a mistake.)  Also, the game is usually not challenging.  It only looks challenging.  And, yet, from playing the racing game with different cars and engines, I don’t have much impact for any difference to happen.  What does this mean?  It’s not a game for a challenge.  It’s just a beautiful program for the “illusion” of “racing” skill.  I find this racing game disagreeable.  Yes, I know.  I did have a laugh here and there.  But, I need to play a game.  Often, I’m just watching Cruis’n Blast.  As evidence for this review, consider this “driving option” I’m mentioning- with this “driving option”, you can let the game do the normal driving speed for you.  That’s right!  You can almost let the game drive for you!  This is offensive and ridiculous.  I guess the programmers are afraid of challenges.  Then again, Cruis’n Blast contains earthquakes, falling wind farms, loose rollercoasters, illegal train routes, stupid monkeys, outrageous ice lakes, weak skyscrapers, and more- with all these obstacles in the way, perhaps the strict schedule is necessary for computer opponents and whatever human player.  It’s pretty fun to watch.  Of course, I need to play the game.  From what you’re reading here, it’s obvious that gameplay is less and people watching is more.  I have not seen the arcade game.  The programmers are very excitable monsters for this “arcade” energy.  Maybe the programmers think of the children who play arcade games.  Have you seen children in the arcade rooms?  Parents need to teach their children how to play games.  My past school education does not help me with Cruis’n Blast.  My teachers were never interesting players of video games themselves and they were never talking about real video games.  I have a book with the name The Moral Compass by William J. Bennett.  It’s a book about morals.  It’s very much like a philosophy book.  On page 189, there’s a statement about happiness and effortless attitude.  It says, “Contentment is not synonymous with effortlessness.”  What does that mean?  It means this:


“Happy” reviewers who find Cruis’n Blast to be “effortless” are pseudo philosophers.  They may even be pseudo players!  I think this discovery is safe to finish with my claim here.




https://www.deviantart.com/gameuniverso/art/Review-of-Cruis-n-Blast-Nintendo-Switch-908298608

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